Beliefs | The Church of Bigfoot

🦶 What We Believe + Declaration of Faith & Ordination Authority

The Church of Bigfoot is a legally recognized spiritual community dedicated to creating a space where everyone—no matter their background, beliefs, or level of weirdness—feels welcome. We celebrate the mysterious, honor the unconventional, and believe spirituality can be both sincere and joyfully strange. Through free online ordinations, heartfelt ceremonies, and a blend of humor and wonder, we connect people to nature, to each other, and to the stories that spark curiosity.

Values

Inclusivity – Every person is welcome here. We embrace all walks of life, all beliefs, and all levels of belief (or disbelief) in Bigfoot.
Spiritual Freedom – Faith is personal. We honor diverse paths, encouraging exploration, connection, and self-expression.
Wonder & Mystery – We see the unknown not as something to fear, but as an invitation to imagine, explore, and grow.
Ordination for All – We make ordination accessible, free, and meaningful, empowering members to perform weddings, blessings, and other ceremonies with sincerity and creativity.
Kindness & Connection – We value compassion, community, and care for one another—and for the natural world we share.
Playfulness with Purpose – Humor and lightheartedness are not distractions from spirituality—they are part of it.

The Sacred Beliefs of The Church of Bigfoot
At The Church of Bigfoot we are a spiritually curious community of seekers, skeptics, forest whisperers, and folks who firmly believe that just because it was blurry doesn’t mean it wasn’t real.

Our beliefs are rooted in ancient wisdom, modern nonsense, and the unwavering conviction that something weird is definitely going on out there.

🌲 Core Beliefs

1. The Universe Is Weird on Purpose
We believe the universe is intentionally mysterious. If everything made sense, we wouldn’t need trail cams or holy water.

2. Wonder Is a Form of Worship
We revere awe. We honor the unknown. And we raise our binoculars in spiritual solidarity.

3. Blurry Photos Are a Sign of Faith
If it’s crystal clear, it’s probably fake. If it’s pixelated, overexposed, and accompanied by a weird sound in the distance — that’s sacred documentation.

4. All Life Is Sacred (Especially the Hairy Kind)
We respect all beings: human, cryptid, animal, interdimensional, or neighbor Greg (who honestly might be a shapeshifter).

5. Nature Is Our Cathedral
Forests are our temples. Campfires are our altars. And yes, mosquitoes are probably some kind of divine test.

6. Laughter Is Liturgical
We take humor seriously. If you’ve never laughed during a spiritual experience, you’ve never watched someone mistake a log for Bigfoot in night vision.

7. Mystery Is the Holiest Thing There Is
We don’t need all the answers. We just need good boots, open minds, and snacks. Especially snacks. (Lieutenant Jenn can teach you how to pack these properly)

8. You Don’t Have to Believe to Belong
Whether you’re fully committed, mildly intrigued, or just here for the gear — welcome. You’re one of us now.

👣 Our Sacred Texts Include:

Field Reports
Unconfirmed sightings
That one thermal image that looks like a ghost with a mullet
Notes scribbled on damp napkins from midnight hikes
Your uncle’s story about “that time in ‘84” (we believe him)

🕊️ In Summary

We believe in truth, wonder, community, ceremony, and creatures that may or may not exist.
We believe that spirituality and silliness can share a tent.
We believe that love is real, and so is something watching us from the tree line.
And most importantly…
We believe in you. (But if you start glowing or levitating, we will ask questions.)

🦶 The 13 Commandments of The Church of Bigfoot

As revealed (blurrily) through fog, footprints, and faith.

1. Thou Shalt Keep Thine Eyes Open
Even (and especially) when the world tells you to look away. The truth walks softly — and sometimes covered in fur.

2. Thou Shalt Not Shame the Blurry
The image may be grainy, but the experience was real. We honor all sightings, smudged or stunning.

3. Thou Shalt Respect All Life — Even the Hairy and Reclusive
Whether human, cryptid, or cousin you haven’t seen in years, all beings deserve compassion.

4. Thou Shalt Bless the Journey, Not Just the Destination
Even if Bigfoot never shows, every muddy step was sacred.

5. Thou Shalt Take Snacks into the Forest
Spiritual hunger and trail mix are equally holy. Share freely.

6. Thou Shalt Question Everything — Kindly
Doubt is sacred. Wonder is worship. Belief is a campfire: meant to be tended, not weaponized.

7. Thou Shalt Walk Softly and Carry a Thermal Camera
Be gentle with nature. But stay curious, and maybe a little weird.

8. Thou Shalt Not Go Alone into the Woods (Without Telling Someone)
The divine often appears in pairs. Also, cell service is spotty.

9. If ordained, thou Shalt Bless Weddings, Memorials, and Strange Noises in the Distance
You are empowered to sanctify life’s milestones and mystery’s whispers alike.

10. Thou Shalt Not Bear False Witness (Unless It’s for a Good Prank on Carl)
Be honest. But if Carl’s the one who fell for the cardboard cutout again, we’re not stopping you.

11. Thou Shalt Love Thy Neighbor, Even If They Don’t Believe in Mothman
Faith isn’t about agreement — it’s about acceptance. Hug generously.

12. Thou Shalt Report Sightings Without Fear of Mockery
This is a sanctuary for your strangeness. All reports are sacred (and possibly publishable).

13. Thou Shalt Remember: The Mystery Is the Ministry
You don’t have to find it to believe in it. What matters is that you keep searching — with love, with laughter, and with very comfortable boots.

🛐 Declaration of Faith & Ordination Authority
As recognized by The Church of Bigfoot.

🌲 Our Spiritual Identity

We, the members and ministers of The Church of Bigfoot, recognize the sacredness of the unknown and the divine mystery that lives in both nature and neighbor. We are a spiritual and religious association formed under the freedom of belief granted by the First Amendment of the United States Constitution.

Our faith is rooted in wonder, compassion, reverence for life, and the respectful search for things greater than ourselves — whether found in scripture, starlight, or something very hairy moving just out of frame. We believe that searching is sacred, questions are holy, and that mystery itself may be one of the purest forms of divinity.

✨ Our Religious Purpose

The Church of Bigfoot exists to:

Provide spiritual education and reflections rooted in mystery, awe, and ethical living
Recognize and ordain ministers who feel called to serve their communities through presence, ceremony, and kindness
Offer religious services, including marriages, blessings, memorials, and personal rites of passage
Foster a community where spiritual seekers — cryptid-curious and otherwise — may explore belief without shame, fear, or exclusion
Celebrate the unseen, the unexplained, and the deeply human impulse to connect with the unknown

📜 Our Authority to Ordain

The Church of Bigfoot hereby affirms its legal and spiritual authority to grant ordination to individuals who share its values and beliefs.

By this declaration, we:

Authorize the ordination of ministers who wish to perform weddings, funerals, blessings, and other spiritual ceremonies
Maintain an internal registry of ordained individuals and issue physical or digital certificates upon request
Encourage all ordained ministers to act with integrity, compassion, and humor — the sacred trifecta

Ordination through The Church of Bigfoot is granted as a spiritual rite, not a novelty, and is intended for individuals who feel sincerely called to serve others with love, mystery, and meaning.

🧭 The Nature of Our Belief

We do not claim exclusive truth.
We do not demand specific theology.
We believe in kindness, curiosity, and the possibility that something wild, gentle, and divine is always just beyond the tree line.

We believe that you don’t have to find Bigfoot to believe in something bigger.
And that anyone who walks through the world with reverence and open eyes is already a kind of minister.

✍️ Signed in Good Faith

This declaration is made by Archminister Jake Howard, Founder of The Church of Bigfoot, on behalf of all members, ministers, and fellow wanderers of the sacred unknown.

May your path be strange,
Your heart be kind,
And your lens be ever slightly out of focus.

🦶 What We Believe + Declaration of Faith & Ordination Authority

Values

Inclusivity – Every person is welcome here. We embrace all walks of life, all beliefs, and all levels of belief (or disbelief) in Bigfoot.

Spiritual Freedom – Faith is personal. We honor diverse paths, encouraging exploration, connection, and self-expression.

Wonder & Mystery – We see the unknown not as something to fear, but as an invitation to imagine, explore, and grow.

Ordination for All – We make ordination accessible, free, and meaningful, empowering members to perform weddings, blessings, and other ceremonies with sincerity and creativity.

Kindness & Connection – We value compassion, community, and care for one another—and for the natural world we share.

Playfulness with Purpose – Humor and lightheartedness are not distractions from spirituality—they are part of it.

🛐 Declaration of Faith & Ordination Authority As recognized by The Church of Bigfoot.

🛐 Declaration of Faith & Ordination Authority
As recognized by The Church of Bigfoot.